After a lifetime of summer on the city pavements, suddenly I’ve found myself a country girl.  Aside from this current trip to the great state of Maine for work, I’ve ventured Whitewater rafting in Massachusetts and lounged with some friends near Hudson, NY.  And, most enjoyably, (albeit exhausting-ly) we spent nearly a week in Rhinebeck in the Hudson Valley prepping and executing one of the most special, fabulous and entertaining weddings that we’ve ever done.  Here is a sneak peak at some of my favorite images of Marni and Josh’s amazing wedding at Locusts on Hudson shot by Justin Demers and of StillMotion.  When I’m back in the office, I’ll be sure to share more..  For now, enjoy!

Obviously everyone knows of Kleinfeld. Growing up in Brooklyn, when it was still in Brooklyn, I would walk around Bay Ridge with my best friend and dream of getting to go inside and see what was in their VAST, vast store. My first time there as a wedding professional was the most exciting thing in my life up to that point. We met people from Texas and Spain in the lobby while we waited and worked with Dianne. There truly isn’t any other place like it.

And, like everyone reading this, I am of course a fan of the show. I delight in it, really. It’s also the only wedding related show that doesn’t give me heart palpitations of anxiety that something will go wrong. And while the show does show case their many wonderful consultants, the fabulous Randy Fanoli, wonderful Joan and Ronnie and Mara, there is one face that is less familiar to viewers, but possibly the most AMAZING wedding professional in bridal fashion that I’ve yet to work with. Her name is Rochel Leah and she is the Kleinfeld specialist in Modifications, Religious alterations and build-ups. She is a Diamond among gems.

We recently took our client who is having a Modern Orthodox ceremony and needed an amazing, modern and young gown, but that still fit the religious guidelines of their Rabbi. Rochel Leah’s care before the appointment, during the appointment and her follow up to ensure that we were comfortable with all of our adjustments and promised us that she would be with us every step of the way. In short, she is simply magnificent. Should you need a build up of a dress or to shop for a dress with religious requirements in mind, Rochel Leah should most certainly be your first stop.

We are so thrilled to be New Yorkers as we celebrate the landmark legislation that passed Legalizing Gay Marriage in our state… Hopefully this will start a domino effect of many states passing similar legislation, Or, better yet, motivate us as a country to make this legal Federally. It seems almost silly that a marriage that is legal in one state would be null and void should you travel or move to another. But, technically speaking, that’s currently the case.

Still, let’s not harp on what ISN’T and instead we at Always a Bridesmaid want to celebrate what IS and praise all of the courageous Republican legislators who went against the grain and voted for equal protection under the law for everyone. Love is love and everyone should have the right to commit their lives to whom they want to. And we are so proud of our state for finally recognizing that… now, for our President.

I wanted to start my week off right, so I decided to tell you about a wonderful couple that we helped down the aisle this past December. We loved Heather from the first day she came into the office. Cheerful and just as sarcastic as I am, we bonded immediately. I was the main planner on her wedding, but Xochitl would often join us just because we loved Heather so! We started planning over a year from the wedding date (which is actually rare) and we got so much done so quickly, that for months we would just meet to hang out. So, needless to say, I have TONS to say about this wedding. In the interest of time, and for to maximize your attention span, I will try to tell you all of my favorite elements. Really, what it boiled down to is that this wedding was truly about them. Things that they loved were incorporated into the day and people knew that the were at a Heather & Espo event. So without further ado, I will tell you all about what they did right!

1. Say it with Paper- Heather loved paper. She was one of these rare creatures (like Xochitl and myself) that could spend hours at Paper Presentation and gawk at paper products. She also had very clear ideas about what she wanted to see for both the STD and invitation for her wedding. When confronted with this combo we often suggest custom stationary, and it so happens that our favorite Regas NY had also been referred to her  by another friend, so a match made in paper was born. The Save the Date was modeled after a vintage post card, while the main invite was based on the mercury glass that Heather loved, and that found its way to tons of our wedding elements.

My favorite part of the invite was that their nicknames were printed on the invite liner. How cute is that?!

Now, the real crown jewel of this invite series was the Program. Heather wanted a stationary piece that everyone would get when they walked into the event. In the piece they would find their escort card, a menu, a program, and a note of thanks from the couple. Heather had a ton of “mock-ups” that she worked on herself, and Regas just polished it up a bit and came up with this, in the eggplant color that was our accent color for the wedding:

2. Downtown Bride- Heather came to us with her venue selected, The Angel Orensanz Foundation. Now, if you have ever see it or attended an event there, you know that it is a stunning and unique venue. Since the event was in the winter, Heather wanted to get ready as close to the event as possible, and take photos in the area. A suite at The Hotel on Rivington down the street solved that, and is only 2 blocks away from the venue. What could be easier? Thanks to our prayers being answered, the day was unusually warm, and we were able to have them meet for the first time on the THOR penthouse terrace, and honestly can you top this view?

3. Take advantage of your ‘hood- Heather and Espo loved their photographer, AAB favorite Dave Robbins. They wanted to walk around the neighborhood and take candids of the two of them, and focus less on posed shots. They were a bit camera shy, so it helps that Dave is literally like a buddy you want to hang out with. He helped them relax and take these truly stunning shots.

I gasped when I saw this photo. Honestly, one of my favorite wedding photos of all time.

4. “We are gathered here today…”- Now, most weddings that you see at Angel Oresanz will have the couple being married at the foot of the alter/stage. Heather and Espo wanted their wedding to be intimate and feel like people were surrounding them, rather than be up on a stage. We opted to have them enter through the front of the space and have guests sit in the round, with the ceremony taking place in the center of the venue. A simple set-up let them be the stars of the show, and let no guest be further than 3 rows away from them.

5. Let Them Eat Cake- Both Heather and Espo cared about serving fantastic food. Thanks to a lovely menu by Creative Edge Parties we served up a fantastic meal that included Braised Short Ribs and Branzini…yum. Now, what Heather was really excited about was cake:) From day one she told us how cake and coffee were her favorite part of the meal. So rather than one large cake, each of the tables had a smaller cake. She wanted them to feel free to dig in at any point of the night. I thought that we should wait and pass out the serving pieces later in the evening, but she knows her crowd, because people started asking for them to be cut OR cutting them themselves early in the night!They also served as our table numbers, because we like to multi-task:)

6. Love your venue- The great thing about Angel Orensanz is that it needs so little. Heather wanted to let the venue shine. She loved the idea of a simple table top and cool lighting to showcase the space.We used ivory linens on the tables, but mixed in cool mercury glass accents to make the look tie together.

7. Last but not least- Heather was obsessed with a deconstructed smores favor. She literally put all of these together herself, and we passed them out at the end of the night. Yummy. I had one (or two) myself!

This post could be SO long, because I think that Heather and Espo infused their event with so many personal touches. However, I have another Angel O client that needs my attention, so a lucky 7 top details will have to do!

Congratulations to the happy couple!

The Q: I just got RSVPs from two different girlfriends of mine who are single and not dating anyone who filled in their card with their name and Guest. Actually, one girl wrote in her date’s name (a name I have never heard her talk about) and the other girl literally just said “and guest”.   I don’t know how to respond because on one hand I’m annoyed that they would be so rude, AND I don’t really want a random stranger at my wedding, but I also can put myself in their shoes and wouldn’t want to be alone. Do I confront them about it?  Should I tell them no?  If I tell them yes, do I ask for them to pay for their date?

The A: A common etiquette problem that we’ve gotten here and that I hear about all the time is when single guests are invited alone and then they reply that they are bringing a date.  It IS very rude for them to invite someone who wasn’t intended to be invited, made audacious mainly because they extended your invitation to someone else without clearing it first with their hostess. It isn’t a backyard BBQ, it is a wedding.

I think that almost every bride would, regardless of whether they ultimately OK’d it or not, so appreciate an email or phone call from the singly invited guest saying that before they responded formally, they wondered if they might be able to bring a date. Which, while awkward for you to be asked, at least makes it less presumptuous than the guest just deciding that they are bringing someone and you needing to then confront them about it after the RSVP.

However, that said, I’ve been wondering of late if this breach of etiquette isn’t sometimes a bit of a chicken and an egg issue. While by no means are you obligated to invite single guests with no known companion with a date, isolating singles across the board to be dateless should be done on a case by case basis.

What do I mean by that?  Well, if you know that most of your girlfriends are single and not dating anyone in particular, then I think by all means keep all the single ladies as exactly that, and they will probably hit the dance floor and have a ball.  That said, if you know that you have three single girlfriends and the rest of your friends are married and all of the guys there will be attached to dates as well… well, you may want to open up the possibility of including that small handful of single guests with an “And Guest”.  Ultimately, everyone wants your guests to want to attend your wedding and to end up having a great time.  If they don’t know other people, or feel awkward because they don’t have a dancepartner, etc. then it will probably be harder for them to loosen up and go with it.

So, back to your problem at hand.  Well, first, never, under any circumstances EVER allow a guest to pay for their date in order to bring someone else. That is simply the tackiest thing.  Even if they offer, it’s better for you not to say that.  So, if you decide NO, you don’t want their dates there either for budgetary reasons or on principle, and the guest offers to pay for a date, simply decline and say “It’s really more about wanting to feel that we know each and every guest at our wedding” or something kind of like that.

Ultimately though, you have every right to contact them and say “You know, and I”m so sorry to make this awkward, but I noticed you responded with a date, but the invitation was actually just for you as we’re trying to keep our guest count down.”  However, if you decide that these two guests probably would have a much better time with a date, or that maybe they are the only two of your friends that wouldn’t have dates, so what are two extra people….well, simply don’t say anything. There isn’t any reason for you to tell them about their “rudeness” only to say “but, you know what? It’s totally cool, bring the date.”